MDNA Skin, You might get some garters some day

“Your body smells of honey from the comb.  Your amber silken skin smells of your mind.”

“Infinity.  Immortal.”

“If you  buy her product you might get some garters some day.”  This was my bf’s review after watching Madonna’s promo for her skin care line.  I asked if he learned anything about the products, “Absolutely not.”  He was impressed with the sexy, black and white ad and I was not.  I thought it was a joke, a parody of skin care.

I get it.  Madonna needs to stay relevant.  She’s bored and she needs to dabble in something.  Sitting at home, reading a book is not in her wheelhouse.  Partnering up with an existing skin care line is so done.  She’s Madonna.  She can create her own high-end skin care line.  Will it be amazing and keep us as young and fresh looking as her?  It’s hard to know since none of that was communicated in the promo.  According to her website MDNA SKIN will “challenge women and their awareness about the art and beauty of skin care.”  Oh.  It’s not supposed to make us laugh?

It has launched exclusively in Tokyo with a dedicated Japanese website.  Under the “Concept” tab is another black and white video flashing images and words of inspiration.  Her high fashion connections/collaborators are on display as the video is credited to Steven Klein and Mert and Marcus.  There’s no news of the chrome clay mask, skin rejuvinator(her spelling)  and serum hitting the States so we either have to bribe someone visiting Tokyo to pick some up or just wait for the reviews.

I wish Madonna had given us videos of herself applying the products and describing their benefits.  A sexy demo session not so choppily edited would have been okay.  Give us you in your fake boudoir, performing as only you can, telling us what we cannot live without.  Maybe she will.  Until then I’ll wait “hours, months, years” before trying it.